Whatever. I'll try to stay clear of that trap today. I want to make a record of what's been going on, or at least some of it, if only for my own personal reasons, so this might be a good time to run along and read someone else who is funny, or cheerful or, at the very least, can bitch effectively. If you've got lots of time to kill, you might want to click on my links button on your left. Lots of good stuff there, I promise.

So. Some things are better. I thought I had unloaded one of my Board positions, but that didn't quite work out the way I had hoped. On the other hand, I did gain an assistant, and I am profoundly grateful for that.

The allergies, I realize, are a part of life and something that must be Dealt With. I've pretty much stopped complaining about them all together, with only the occasional relapse. Truth be told, I haven't even really thought about them lately. They're just there, and that is that. I don't even really notice them these days. Maybe I've gotten used to them, or maybe it's because I've had too many other nasty surprises competing for my attention.

Odd, often unpleasant, things tend to happen to me. There are all the strange and recurrent injuries that are part and parcel of being a klutz. And there's the myriad plumbing problems that are most likely part and parcel of some curse we seem to have picked up somewhere. And, lest I get bored and complacent, there are the standard daily annoyance type problems of the 'I can't believe this is happening to me' variety. But the thing about those sort of problems, you can look back and laugh at them at some point in the future. Maybe not while the shit is actually happening, but you can at least envision having a giggle about it all after the passage of a sufficient amount of time. Take the plumbers: even while the bastards are actually in my presence, I can imagine laughing about it some day, especially if my imagination stretches to gleeful dismemberment and the laughter is a touch on the maniacal side.

But the stuff that's been going on lately just isn't the kind of stuff I can see myself laughing about: not now, not a year from now, not ever. Some of it has been working out OK, after a fashion. I suppose it's nice to know that I can reschedule an entire vacation in 24 hours if I absolutely have to, even one that took three weeks to work out in the first place, even on that's been completely paid for, even one that's due to start in less than ten days. Sure, thanks to Greek ferry scheduling and the rapidly approaching high season-- with its incoming horde of tourists, all of which booked well in advance-- we'll be trapped in the hotel at the Athens airport for 14 hours, waiting for our 6:00 am flight to the islands. It's a shame that the airport is so far from the city of Athens, or we might be able to salvage something of the day, but that can hardly be helped. And the Company has agreed to reimburse Elvis for our not inconsiderable expenses caused by the rescheduling, so that's good. And, hey-- we're still going to Greece. What's not to like?

I'm still mad at Swiss International Airlines, though. I am well acquainted with non-refundable tickets, but tickets that you cannot change full stop, for any reason, even after paying a hefty fee to do so, even if you're booked on the exact same flights just one week later, is a new one on me. Important safety tip: apparently more and more airlines are selling tickets like this, and they don't always make that fact clear at the time of purchase. Suffice it to say, we won't be flying with them again. The travel agent who sold them to me in the first place was really sweet, though. Sweet, and pissed off-- she turned getting some sort of a refund, no matter how small, into a personal quest. Somehow, I get the feeling not many of her clients will be flying with Swiss International, either.

Actually, I'm rather hoping they go the way of SwissAir. Wishful thinking, no doubt, but a girl can dream, can't she?

Things are hotting up on the Project, forcing Elvis to work vast quantities of hours and making him very, very stressed out. This happens at some point in every project, and it's a double whammy for me. First, I feel his stress as if it were my own. I feel just terrible to see him so edgy, so tense, under so much pressure. I just want to help him out, to do whatever I can to make it better. Of course, there's not a whole lot I can do, and what I try to do always backfires because, secondly, when he's stressed out he takes it out on me. He always seems so touchy lately, and nothing I do is right, everything I do is wrong, and he spends most of his time being furious with me. Even an immediate and sincere apology isn't always good enough, even though I am always genuinely sorry that I've upset him in some way. But lately, even the most humble of my apologies appear to be useless, and he gets furious with me for "not being contrite enough". I know he doesn't mean to take everything out on me, but it hurts. I love him with all my heart and soul, and he's a good man, but I really don't know what else I can possibly do except stay out of his way, and that plan backfires, too. It's an incredibly difficult situation, and I feel so powerless.

Speaking of which, something awful happened while I was downtown last week. This occurred, funnily enough, while I was in the best mood I've been in for quite a while. Not only had I managed to find a store that sells bikinis for women who have actual hips, everything else, the more important stuff, was seeming brighter as well. Things were looking up! Stuff was getting sorted!

Stuff was getting stolen. From my bag, as it happens. While it was slung over my shoulder, while I rummaged through the racks for a bikini top in something a bit larger than a 34B. I noticed as soon as I went into the dressing room and set my bag on the floor, in the back corner of the booth so no one could reach in and grab it while I was distractedly staring in horror at the size of my ass in the mirror. The bag was open, and I knew what happened immediately. The good news is, they didn't get my phone, so I was able to call Elvis at work. He was calm and soothing and said he'd drop everything and come to my rescue. More good news: I got my wallet back. They took the cash, of course, but they dumped the wallet elsewhere in the store. Thankfully, they didn't take my credit cards, or my ID, or my train pass and so forth. I was incredibly fortunate on that account, so I was able to call Elvis and tell him I could manage on my own. The other stuff, however, I won't be seeing again. Not my wonderful new sunglasses (6 weeks old!). Not the little purse that looks like it might have money in it, but in reality held, among the nail file and lipgloss etc., some allergy medication (not available over the counter here, unfortunately), a pillbox given to me when we lived in Turkey, and a spare battery for my mobile phone. And I'll certainly never see my pocket pc again, either.

But I'm looking on the bright side of that one, too. I synch it with my laptop every morning, so not much data was lost. They didn't get the nifty fold up keyboard, either, and those things are difficult to get around here unless you use a Palm Pilot, which I don't.

It could have been worse, much worse. I could have been hurt, for example, actually mugged. As it was, all that was hurt was my pride and our bank balance. After I called Elvis to tell him that the wallet had been found, contents intact except for cash, and that he could call off the calvary, I went deep into the bowels of the building to file a report and listen to a deeply humiliating lecture on the virtues of being careful from a security guard who appeared to be all of fourteen years old. You don't need to tell me all this, I thought. I lived in Istanbul for damn near a year and a half. I've lived all over, travelled all over, even rode the infamous Number 64 bus in Rome, and I have never been pickpocketed, had my bag snatched, had somebody walk off with my coat or bag in a restaurant or bar, nothing.

And then I realized that I had just had my bag cleaned out, in a neighborhood of Lisbon with which I am very familiar and comfortable, while I was actually wearing it, and I hadn't suspected a thing at the time.

Maybe I did need that lecture after all.

And that is that. Well, most of the important stuff, anyway. That's one concept I'm getting grasp on, a little more each day. Most of the things I think of as being important, aren't. Not really, not when it comes right down to it. Things don't work our the way I planned? It doesn't matter, they worked out, eventually, or they will. We have our health and each other. We also have good food to eat and a nice place to live and a damn fine life in general. It's not like I ever forget that, because I don't, but I do need to focus on the big picture a little more. I shouldn't dwell on the past, but look to the future.